


Letting My Walls Down For You

by MizBabyGirl



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Flirting, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 10:01:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24847960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizBabyGirl/pseuds/MizBabyGirl
Summary: After getting his heart broken on Valentine's Day, Kirby has built up a wall between himself & love. He's reluctant to get into another relationship out of fear of being hurt all over again; however, he's in for a surprise when he meets Adam Boqvist at the Chicago Blackhawks' development camp.
Relationships: Adam Boqvist/Kirby Dach
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Valentine's Day 2019** _  
_

_"Can you meet me outside the rink? We need to talk."_

Those last four words sent chills down Kirby's spine. He and the Saskatoon Blades were coming off a big win in which Kirby had two goals and two assists. He was looking forward to celebrating the rest of Valentine's Day with his boyfriend, Jason. 

Kirby was surprised when Jason didn't show up for the game. He thought, "Well, maybe he's just running a little late." By the second period, Jason wasn't there. "Maybe he had car trouble or something," he thought.

By the third period, Jason still hadn't showed up which concerned Kirby, but he continued to keep himself focused on the game.

When Kirby read Jason's text message after the game, he knew something was up when he read the words, _"We need to talk."_ To him, those words usually mean either something good is going to happen or something bad is going to happen. He hoped that it wasn't bad.

Once he had gotten himself dressed, Kirby walked outside the ice arena and noticed Jason standing in the parking lot next to his car.

"Hey, Jase," said Kirby as he hugged him. "We got the W tonight. Got four points."

"Congratulations. I'm sorry that I couldn't be there to see it," said Jason.

"Yeah. How come you weren't there?" asked Kirby. "Did something happen?"

"Kirby, I... um... I'm not sure how to tell you this," said Jason.

"What is it?" asked Kirby.

"Believe me, I've been trying to find the words to say it all day. I don't even know where to begin," said Jason, looking nervous.

"What is it?" Kirby repeated.

"Kirby, you know that I've been supportive of your hockey career. I understand that it takes up a lot of your time, and it keeps you away from your family, your friends, me," said Jason. "I knew what I was getting into when I first started dating you, and I was okay with that. But since then, you've been focused on pursuing a career in professional hockey and I've been focused on my dream of pursuing a career in graphic design. At this point, we're focused on different things in our lives and... and now that you're close to making it to the NHL, I don't want to stand in the way of you pursuing your dream."

Kirby could feel the tears stinging in his eyes. From the tone of Jason's voice, he had a feeling where this conversation was going. "Are you... are you breaking up with me?" he asked.

"I think... I think that it would be best if we went our separate ways," said Jason.

At that moment, Kirby felt his heart break and he was trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall from his eyes. "I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe you're doing this," he said.

Jason gently placed his hand on Kirby's shoulder. "Sweetheart, I know this isn't..." he was about to say.

"Don't call me sweetheart!" Kirby snapped, pushing Jason's hand off his shoulder. "You're not standing in the way of my dream. I want you to be a part of it. I want you to be there for me. I thought... I thought we'd be always be together. I love you."

"I love you too, Kirby, but now that I'm getting close to finishing up school and ready to go to university in Toronto, I'm ready to start a new chapter in my life," said Jason. "I know that we've talked about staying together after high school, but we were almost 14 years old back then. We were just kids. Now we're 18. We're becoming adults. I've got to focus on the future. And you know sometimes high school relationships don't always last forever."

Kirby brushed away a tear slipping down his cheek. "So that's it? It's over?" he asked.

"I'll always remember the good times we had together, everything that we've been through for the past four in a half years," said Jason. "I'll never forget you..." 

"Just go," Kirby said looking devastated.

"Kirby...," Jason was about to say.

"I said just go! Just go! I don't want to see you anymore!" Kirby yelled. Sadly, Jason watched as Kirby stormed out of the parking lot before getting into his car. As he sat out on the curb outside the ice arena, Kirby could hear the sound of an ignition starting and saw Jason's car pulling out of the parking lot, and driving off.

This was not the way Kirby thought his day would end. He didn't expect that the guy that he dated for four in a half years, the guy that was one of his biggest supporters in pursuing his hockey dream, the guy that he thought was the love of his life would break up with him on Valentine's Day.

* * *

Kirby hitched a ride home with one of his teammates. As he walked through the back door, he noticed his parents curled up on the couch together in the living room, asleep to the noise of a black-and-white romantic comedy movie in the background. 

_"At least they're having a nice Valentine's Day together,"_ he thought.

As he headed upstairs to his bedroom, Kirby took his jacket off & threw it onto the ground. He curled up in bed and let out the tears that he was holding back. His younger brother, Colton could hear the sounds of sniffling and whimpering from Kirby's bedroom.

He gently knocked on the door and asked, "It's Colton. Can I come in?"

"Yeah," said Kirby.

Colton walked into Kirby's bedroom. He could see Kirby lying flat on his back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, his face streaked in tears, and his eyes all red & puffy from crying.

"Did something happen at the game tonight?" Colton asked him.

"It's over," Kirby said.

"What do you mean it's over?" asked Colton, looking concerned.

"Me and Jason. Our relationship is over," said Kirby. "He broke up with me tonight."

"On Valentine's Day?" asked Colton. 

Kirby nodded and felt the tears forming in his eyes again. Colton didn't say anything else. He just curled up on the bed next to Kirby, comforting him.


	2. Chapter 2

**June 2019**

It's been four months since Jason broke up with Kirby on Valentine's Day. In the weeks following the break-up, Kirby cried, cursed until he was red in the face, and punched the pillows on his bed until he wore himself out. Later on, he took down the pictures of himself & Jason in his bedroom, and got rid of everything that reminded him of Jason. 

Since then, the two of them have moved on with their lives with Jason preparing to go to the University of Toronto and Kirby preparing for the 2019 NHL Entry Draft (where he was ranked third among North American skaters in the NHL Central Scouting Services' final draft rankings).

The night before the draft, Kirby checks his phone which is full of messages from friends, relatives and teammates, wishing him good luck. He's not surprised that he didn't get a message from Jason. He doubts if he even has his phone number anymore.

Kirby hasn't given much thought to how Jason is doing or how he's dealing with the break-up.

"If he's moving on, so am I," he said to himself.

* * *

The next day, Kirby is full of nerves and anticipation, wondering what team would select him and where he would begin his career as a professional hockey player in the National Hockey League.

As he anxiously awaits to hear his name being called, Colton notices Kirby's foot tapping rapidly on the ground.

"You okay?" asked Colton.

"Yeah, I'm okay," said Kirby.

"This is pretty exciting, eh?" asked Colton. "I can't wait to see where you'll be playing in the NHL."

"Me too," said Kirby as he started to relax a bit. 

Then, Stan Bowman, the general manager of the Chicago Blackhawks announces, "With the third pick, the Blackhawks are proud to select from the Saskatoon Blades, Kirby Dach."

Kirby can't believe it. Not only he was selected third overall in the draft, he was chosen by the Chicago Blackhawks, an Original Six team, the team where he idolized star players Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane as a kid.

As he puts on the Blackhawks jersey and hat, Kirby feels happy and proud; however, as he looks into the crowd with his family smiling (and Colton giving him a big thumbs up), the mood becomes bittersweet. 

When he dreamed about being drafted into the NHL, Kirby pictured Jason in the crowd with his family, congratulating him with a hug & a kiss. He imagined him saying, _"You did it, Kirby. I'm so proud of you, sweetheart."_

Although the moment wasn't what Kirby dreamed that it would be, he was excited to be a part of the Chicago Blackhawks organization and couldn't wait to start his NHL career with them.

* * *

** July 2019 **

Kirby arrives at the Blackhawks' development camp with a determined, positive attitude and a goal that he would be a part of the opening night roster when the Hawks play against the Philadelphia Flyers in Prague. As they head out into the ice, he runs into Alex Nylander, who was recently acquired by the Blackhawks from the Buffalo Sabres.

"So you're the third overall pick I've been hearing about?" asked Alex.

"Uh, yes, I am," said Kirby.

Alex takes hold of Kirby's hand and shakes it. "I'm Alex. Nice to meet you."

Kirby shakes Alex's hand back and responds back, "I'm Kirby. Nice to meet you too."

"So, is this your first time in Chicago?" asked Alex.

"Yeah. What about you?" asked Kirby.

"No, it's not my first time in Chicago. I was here a few years ago when my dad played for the Blackhawks," said Alex.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot your dad played in Chicago. He was... uh... he was a good player," said Kirby.

Alex smiled. "Thanks."

Just as Kirby and Alex were about to step out on the ice, Kirby notices a tall, blonde-haired guy walk pass them (along with two other guys) with the number #27 and the name "Boqvist" on the back of his jersey. He only gets a quick glimpse, but when he looks into the guy's stunning blue eyes, Kirby is mesmerized by him.

"Hello? Kirby, Hello?" Kirby snaps out of his daze when he hears Alex's voice.

"Are you coming out on the ice or what?" asked Alex.

"Yeah, yeah. Of course," said Kirby.


	3. Chapter 3

When Kirby heard from Alex that the annual Blackhawks fans convention was usually quite crowded, he didn't believe it at first, but when he actually saw it with his own eyes, he was full of awe and excitement. What made it even more exciting was that he was going to be a part of it.

Throughout development camp, Kirby has bonded quite well with Alex. During their downtime, they spent time together watching Netflix, taking in the sights of Chicago and hearing stories from Alex about when his dad played in Chicago. Kirby also couldn't help but think about that tall blonde-haired guy, Adam Boqvist with the stunning blue eyes; however, he didn't get a chance to speak to him that much.

When he wasn't at camp, Kirby was being interviewed about being the number-three pick in this year's draft; Bowman had him in his office, talking about how happy he is about Kirby being a part of the team's future, and even working out terms for him to sign an entry-level contract with the team.

When he got to the hotel for the Blackhawks convention, Kirby met a few of the other Blackhawks such as Alex DeBrincat, Dylan Strome and Connor Murphy. He also chatted with a few other Blackhawks prospects who were at camp with him.

As Kirby was waiting in the holding room with the other Blackhawks as they waited to be called up on the stage to meet the fans, he heard a voice say, "How are you liking Chicago so far?"

Kirby looked up and right in front of him was Jonathan Toews, and standing next to him as well was Patrick Kane. He couldn't believe it. He was face to face with the players that he grew up watching as a kid. 

"Wow. Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane. It's uh.... it's nice to meet you guys," Kirby said looking very starstruck. 

"It's nice to meet you too," said Jonathan as he shook Kirby's hand. 

"You didn't answer his question," said Patrick.

"What was the question?" Kirby asked.

"How are you liking Chicago?" Jonathan asked.

"Oh, I like it. It's a very nice city," said Kirby. "Um, Nylander.... Alex Nylander has been showing me the sights during our downtime."

"You two are getting along?" asked Patrick.

"Yeah. Definitely," said Kirby.

Jonathan smiled. "Good. That's nice to hear. Listen, if you need to know where any good places are to go out and eat or to shop or whatever, just ask me or Kaner."

"I can text you a few recommendations if you want," Patrick spoke up.

"Sure. I would like that. Thank you," said Kirby.

As Jonathan, Patrick & Kirby each exchanged cell phone numbers, they were approached by Adam.

"Excuse me. I don't mean to interrupt, but they wanted me to tell you guys that it's almost time to go up on stage," said Adam.

"Oh, okay. Thank you.... Adam, right?" asked Jonathan.

"Yes," Adam said.

As everyone headed out of the room to go out on stage, Kirby felt someone tapping him on the shoulder. He turned around and it was Adam. 

"Hi, I don't think we introduced each other. My name is Adam," he said. 

Kirby shook his hand. "I'm Kirby. Sorry we haven't introduced each other either. It's been a busy couple of days," he said.

"Especially if you're the third overall pick in the NHL Entry Draft, right?" asked Adam.

"Right," said Kirby.

"I've seen you at camp. You play a very good game," said Adam.

Kirby smiles. "Thanks. You too."

"So what do you think about Toews and Kane? They are quite the beauties, huh?" Adam asked.

Kirby nodded his head. "Yeah, for sure," he said.

When it was Adam's turn to walk out on the stage, Kirby stared at him and thought, _"But they're not the only beauties on the team."_

* * *

After the last day of the convention, Kirby invites Alex & Adam out to lunch at a diner. "This is a nice place, eh?" asked Kirby as the three of them sat down in a booth.

"Yeah, it was nice of Kaner to recommend it to you," said Alex. 

As they wait for their orders, the three of them chatted amongst each other.

"So what did you think about the convention?" asked Adam. 

"I liked it. It was cool. It was very nice to see all of the fans," said Alex. "What about you, Kirby? Did you think it was cool too?" 

"Yeah. I had no idea there would be so many fans there. It was nice to meet all of them," said Kirby. "Can you imagine how cool it would be to make the opening day roster and play with the team in Prague?"

"Yeah," said Alex.

"That would be cool. Playing on the same ice with Toews and Kane," said Adam. 

As the waitress placed their drinks on the table and Adam leaned over to reach his root beer, Kirby got a good look at his muscular bicep and his eyes wandered on the various tattoos covering his arm.

Adam noticed Kirby eyeing his arm and smiled at him. "You like them?" he asked.

"Like what?" asked Kirby as he quickly took his gaze off Adam's tattoos.

"The tattoos," said Adam.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah. Sorry I didn't mean to stare," said Kirby.

"No, no. It's okay. I don't mind if you look at them," said Adam.

Adam scooches close to Kirby in the booth and starts explaining to him & Alex about how he got the tattoos and what they mean. Kirby listens very attentively to the sound of Adam's voice as he looks at each tattoo when Adam points them out one by one.

"So what do you think?" asked Adam after he finishes explaining his tattoos to Kirby.

"I like them," Kirby said with a grin. "They... uh... they suit you very well."

The waitress approaches their table to give the boys their food. "You don't think Tazer will mind that we're having hot dogs and root beers for lunch?" asked Kirby. "I heard that he's very strict when it comes to eating and exercising."

"Nah, I'm sure he won't mind. Besides, it's the offseason. It's okay to indulge every now and then," said Alex.

"True," said Adam as he took a bite out of his hot dog.

* * *

After eating their lunch, Kirby excuses himself to use the restroom. As soon as he leaves the booth, Alex asks Adam in Swedish, "Så vad tycker du om det här Kirby-barnet?"

"Han är trevlig och han är väldigt snygg också," said Adam.

"Jag visste inte att du gick med killar, Adam," said Alex.

"Ja, det har jag varit sedan jag var nästan 15. Folk vet redan om det. Det är ingen stor överraskning," said Adam. ""Du har inte problem med det, eller hur?"

Alex shook his head as he took a sip of his root beer. "Nej inte alls. Det finns några killar i min bror Willys team som är homosexuella. Det stör mig inte lite," he said.

"Åh bra. Bra," said Adam as he wiped the grease from the hot dog off his fingers with a napkin. "Tror du att Kirby också är med på killar?"

"Jag skulle inte bli förvånad om han var det," said Alex. "Jag såg hur han tittade på dina tatueringar och när han såg dig i lägret."

"Hur så?" asked Adam.

"På den första dagen av lägret innan vi gick ut på isen när du gick förbi oss kunde han inte sluta titta på dig länge," said Alex.

"Verkligen?" asked Adam with a surprised look on his face. 

"Ja," said Alex. "Om ni två är daterade, tror jag att ni skulle göra ett väldigt sött par."

""Hur vet du det? Har du någon slags gaydar eller något?" asked Adam.

Alex laughed. "Nej, jag vet bara en bra kärleksförbindelse när jag ser det," he said.

Adam takes a sip of his root beer and sighs. "Tja, han är en trevlig kille, men jag vill inte skynda mig att träffa så snart. Jag träffade just honom," he said. "Jag behöver lite tid för att lära känna honom innan vi kommer till den punkten, okej?"

"Okej, men jag skulle inte vänta alldeles för länge," said Alex. "En snygg kille som han, jag skulle inte bli förvånad om någon annan har sitt öga på honom också."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Swedish translation of the conversation between Adam & Alex (courtesy of Google Translate)
> 
> "Så vad tycker du om det här Kirby-barnet?"  
> ("So, what do you think about this Kirby kid?")
> 
> "Han är trevlig och han är väldigt snygg också."  
> ("He's nice and he's very good looking too.")
> 
> "Jag visste inte att du gick med killar, Adam."  
> ("I didn't know you were into guys, Adam")
> 
> "Ja, det har jag varit sedan jag var nästan 15. Folk vet redan om det. Det är ingen stor överraskning."  
> ("Yeah, I have been since I was almost 15. People already know about it. It's no big surprise.") 
> 
> "Du har inte problem med det, eller hur?"  
> ("You don't have a problem with it, do you?")
> 
> "Nej inte alls. Det finns några killar i min bror Willys team som är homosexuella. Det stör mig inte lite."  
> ("No, not at all. There are a few guys on my brother Willy's team that are gay. It doesn't bother me a bit.")
> 
> "Åh, bra, bra"  
> ("Oh, good, good")
> 
> "Tror du att Kirby också är med på killar?"  
> ("Do you think that Kirby is into guys too?")
> 
> "Jag skulle inte bli förvånad om han var det. Jag såg hur han tittade på dina tatueringar och när han såg dig i lägret." ("I wouldn't be surprised if he was. I saw the way he looked at your tattoos and when he saw you at camp.")
> 
> "Hur så?" ("How so?")
> 
> "På den första dagen av lägret innan vi gick ut på isen när du gick förbi oss kunde han inte sluta titta på dig länge."  
> ("On the first day of camp before we went out on the ice when you walked past us, he couldn't stop looking at you for a long time.")
> 
> "Verkligen?" ("Really?")
> 
> "Ja. Om ni två är daterade, tror jag att ni skulle göra ett väldigt sött par."  
> ("Yeah. If you two dated, I think that you two would make a very cute couple.")
> 
> ""Hur vet du det? Har du någon slags gaydar eller något?"  
> ("How do you know that? Do you have some kind of gaydar or something?")
> 
> "Nej, jag vet bara en bra kärleksförbindelse när jag ser det."  
> ("No, I just know a good love connection when I see it.")
> 
> "Tja, han är en trevlig kille, men jag vill inte skynda mig att träffa så snart. Jag träffade just honom. Jag behöver lite tid för att lära känna honom innan vi kommer till den punkten, okej?"  
> ("Well, he is a nice guy, but I don't want to rush into dating so soon. I just met him. I need some time to get to know him before we get to that point, okay?")
> 
> "Okej, men jag skulle inte vänta alldeles för länge. En snygg kille som han, jag skulle inte bli förvånad om någon annan har sitt öga på honom också."  
> ("Okay, but I wouldn't wait way too long. A good-looking guy like him, I wouldn't be surprised if somebody else has his eye on him too.")


	4. Chapter 4

** August 2019 **

After the Blackhawks convention comes to an end, Kirby, Alex & Adam go their separate ways for the rest of the summer.

Before they left Chicago, Adam and Kirby exchanged numbers with each other. Although it was hard to say goodbye to him, Kirby couldn't wait to see Adam again in September for training camp. As soon as he returned home to Fort Saskatchewan, Kirby got a text message from Adam, asking him if he made it home okay. 

Throughout the rest of the summer (when he wasn't working on getting into shape for the Blackhawks' training camp), Kirby spent his free time texting and FaceTiming Alex & Adam. Kirby also found himself texting with Adam more often than he would with Alex. They would text each other practically every day. Sometimes, their conversations would last for so many hours that Kirby would end up losing track of time.

* * *

One day, Kirby was lying in his bed, texting Adam when he heard a knock on the door.

"Who is it?" 

"It's Colton. Mom just called. She's on her way home from picking up Callie from her friend's house and she's picking up dinner on the way. She wants you help set the table."

"Okay. Be right there." 

Kirby sent Adam a smiley face emoji and put his phone in his pocket before heading downstairs to help Colton set the table for dinner. 

"You've been on your phone a lot ever since you've gotten home from Chicago," Colton commented. "Have you been talking to your new teammates?"

"Yes, but they're not my teammates yet," said Kirby. "I don't even know if I'm going to be playing for the Blackhawks this season. It all depends on how well I do at training camp."

"I heard the Blackhawks are going to Prague for their season opener against the Philadelphia Flyers," said Colton. "Man, that would be so cool if you went there."

"I know. It would be," said Kirby. As he set down a plate on the table, he felt his phone buzzing in his pocket. He noticed that it was from Adam.

Adam sent him a picture of himself jogging from the other day with a text message that said: _"Got to keep myself in shape for training camp. No indulging on hot dogs and root beers. Captain wouldn't approve, right?"_

Kirby smiled at Adam's message and texted him back. Colton caught a glimpse of what he was texting. "Who's Adam?"

"He's one of the Blackhawks prospects," said Kirby. "I met him at rookie camp while I was in Chicago."

"And apparently, you guys had hot dogs and root beer while you were in Chicago," said Colton as he read the text message on Kirby's phone.

Kirby turns off the screen on his phone and sticks it back in his pants pocket. "Didn't Mom and Dad tell you that it's not polite to snoop?"

"So it looks like you guys are getting along pretty well, eh?" asked Colton.

"Yeah, I guess," said Kirby. 

"Um, I forgot to tell you this when you got back home, but while you were in Chicago, Jason called the house," said Colton.

Kirby looked surprised when he heard that. "Jason? What did he want?"

"He just wanted to know if some of his things that you borrowed were still at the house and he wanted them back," said Colton.

"Did he come over to the house to get them?" asked Kirby.

Colton shook his head. "He asked me to put them in a box and take it over to his house. He didn't want come over and get them himself."

"Okay," said Kirby. "Did he say anything else when you dropped his things off at his house?"

"Like what? About you? About the draft? About Chicago?" asked Colton.

Kirby nodded. "All the above."

"No, not really."

"Oh. Okay," said Kirby.

After a few minutes of awkward silence, Colton says, "Look, I know that it's been almost six months since the breakup and you don't have to answer this question if you don't want to, but..."

"But what?" asked Kirby.

"Are you really over Jason or do you still miss him?" asked Colton.

"Yes, Colton. I'm really over him," said Kirby. "He wants to move on with his life. That's fine. I don't care. Right now, things are good and I want to keep it that way. I don't want to waste my time thinking about him."

"Okay," said Colton. "I was just curious."

"You know what they say about too much curiosity, Colton," said Kirby with a smirk.

Colton smiles back. "Hey, I can't help it. You're my big brother and I just want you to be happy. That's all."

Kirby gets another text message from Adam with two smiley face and laughing emojis. He chuckles softly when he sees Adam's message and thinks to himself, "I am happy, but I'll be even more happy when I see Adam again in September."


	5. Chapter 5

** September 2019 **

The rest of the summer goes by pretty fast for Kirby. With the regular season coming up in a month and the Blackhawks' trip to Europe coming up towards the end of the month, Kirby is looking forward to the Blackhawks' training camp, hoping to make the opening night roster. He's also looking forward to seeing Adam again.

When the Blackhawks prospects traveled to Traverse City, Michigan for the prospect tournament, Kirby sits with Adam on the bus, talking each other's ears off the whole ride there. Whenever Adam laughed or smiled, Kirby couldn't help but smile back at him.

The prospect tournament goes well for the Blackhawks prospects (especially Kirby and Adam); however, during the tournament finale against the Minnesota Wild prospects, Kirby gets injured by Darian Pilan in the first period. Although he was slow to get off the ice at first, he was able to make his way to the locker room after being evaluated by the trainers. 

As he sits in the locker room, Kirby feels upset & disappointed. This was not the way that he hoped to start off the hockey season. He hopes that his injury isn't too serious and that he'll be okay for training camp.

During the second period, Adam sustains a bruised chest after he falls awkwardly into the boards, so he joins Kirby in the locker room too.

"We're like two peas in a pod with our injuries, huh, Kirby?" asked Adam, trying to lighten up the mood.

"Yeah," said Kirby with a slight chuckle, now feeling less upset, especially with Adam by his side.

* * *

Although Adam's chest injury is deemed to be not too serious & he's cleared to participate in training camp, Kirby is diagnosed with a concussion that keeps him out of the Blackhawks' training camp for the first two weeks. Adam is later reassigned to Rockford which means that he wouldn't be joining Kirby and the rest of the Blackhawks in Europe. 

Although he was allowed to travel with the rest of the Blackhawks to Europe and practice with them once he was feeling better, Kirby wasn't expected to play in the games in Berlin & Prague due to his concussion. Despite the distance between them, Kirby and Adam keep in touch through constant text messages and Facetime chats.

One day after practice in Berlin, Kirby gets a text message from Adam: _"Hi, Kirby! :) Hope you're enjoying Europe and that you're feeling better. Wish I was here with you and the team :( Can't wait to see you again."_

As Kirby texts Adam back, he notices Alex talking with Connor Murphy (who was recovering from an injury himself).

"Hey, Kirby," greets Alex & Connor.

"Hey, guys," said Kirby, not even bothering to look up from his phone as he finishes texting his message to Adam.

"Is he texting again?" asked Connor.

"Looks like it," said Alex with a slight eye roll.

"Teenagers and their texting, right?" joked Connor. Kirby heard Connor and Alex laughing, but he just ignored them.

* * *

Although Kirby is disappointed when he learns that he'll begin the season with an injured/non-roster designation (meaning that he won't be in the season opener with the rest of the team), he looks forward to watching the Blackhawks take on the Philadelphia Flyers.

The morning before the season opener in Prague, Alex and Kirby take a walk together outside of the hotel, making small talk with each other

"So, are you looking forward to the game today?" asked Kirby.

"Yeah. I can't wait. I'm sorry that you won't be able to play. I know you were looking forward to it," said Alex.

"It's okay," said Kirby. "At least I get to watch you guys play. Maybe we'll get a chance to play with each other sometime this season, depending on where I end up when we get back home."

"That would be great," said Alex. After a few minutes of silence, he asks Kirby, "So how's Adam doing?"

"Adam? Oh, he's doing fine in Rockford," said Kirby.

"That's good. You guys have been texting each other a lot throughout the trip, huh?" asked Alex.

"I wouldn't say a lot," said Kirby.

"Oh, come on, Kirbs. When you're not practicing, you have that cell phone stuck to your hand like glue," said Alex. 

"Okay, okay," said Kirby with a slight laugh. "Maybe I have been texting a lot, but Adam just wants to know how I'm feeling. He knows that I've been disappointed because I haven't been able to play hockey in a while and he's just trying to cheer me up."

"I see," said Alex. "Um, Kirby?"

"Yeah?"

"There's something I want to ask you and I hope that you don't find this question uncomfortable or anything, but... well....," said Alex.

"What is it?" asked Kirby.

"Well, I know that you and Adam have been getting real close ever since you met each other and um.... I was wondering if...."

"You're wondering if I'm gay, right?" asked Kirby, realizing what Alex was trying to say.

"Yeah. Yeah. That's what I was trying to say," said Alex.

"If you want to know the truth, the answer is yes," said Kirby. "I am gay. I have been openly gay since I was almost 14 years old. Sometimes it takes me a while for me to either tell my teammates about it or they just figure it out gradually overtime."

"Oh. Okay," said Alex.

"You're okay with it, right?" asked Kirby.

Alex nodded with a smile. "Of course I am, man. Besides it's not uncommon in the NHL to have more than one gay player on the team. I'm completely okay with it. Besides, I had a feeling from the first day of prospect camp that you were into guys."

"How so?" asked Kirby.

"From the way you were looking at Adam when we were heading out in the ice," said Alex. "You couldn't take your eyes off him, especially when we were at the diner after the convention and you kept looking at his tattoos."

"And his muscles," said Kirby. He and Alex laughed.

"Well, now that the first question is out of the way, I have another one for you," said Alex.

"Which is?"

"Are you seeing anyone?"

Kirby looked surprised at the question. "Um... well, no, not really. I mean, I was in a relationship with a guy back home in Saskatoon for four in half years."

"Was?" asked Alex.

"Um, we... uh... we broke up back in February," said Kirby. "Actually, he broke up with me on Valentine's Day after a game in the parking lot. It was just so unexpected. I didn't see it coming."

"Fuck, Kirbs. I'm sorry to hear that," said Alex with a sympathetic look on his face.

"Yeah. It was... it was hard to accept it, but after a while, I moved on and so did he," said Kirby. "Ever since I met Adam and we started talking to each other & building a connection, I felt truly happy for the first time in months."

"So, do you like him more than just a friend?" asked Alex.

"No!" Kirby says abruptly. "I mean... I'm not... I'm not sure yet."

"Sure about what?" asked Alex.

"I'm not sure if I like Adam more than just a friend," said Kirby. "And even if I did, I'm just.. I'm not ready to get into another relationship right now. It's... it's hard to explain."

"Oh, I get it," said Alex. "It's hard to date someone else after you've been in a long-term relationship with your ex. Believe me, I've heard that before from my brother, my friends, my teammates..."

"Yeah, yeah. That's it," Kirby said. "That's why I don't want to get into another relationship now."

As he and Alex walked back to the hotel, Kirby thought, _"That was a lie. The real reason I don't want to get into another relationship is because I'm afraid of getting hurt. I'm afraid of getting my heart broken again. I'm afraid if I do start dating again, it's not going to last forever. That's why I don't plan on dating anytime soon. I really like Adam as a friend, but I'm... I'm just not sure if I like him more than that. At least I think I'm sure. I don't know. I just don't know right now."_


	6. Chapter 6

**October 2019  
**  
After the Blackhawks returned from Europe, Kirby was given the okay to play hockey again and he is sent down to Rockford for conditioning purposes. Even though he's disappointed that he won't be able to play in the Blackhawks' home opener against San Jose, Kirby is happy that he's able to play again this season and what makes it even more better is that Adam will be there so he'll have plenty of time to spend with him on and off the ice.

On his first day in Rockford, Kirby talks with the coaching staff as they explain the conditioning process to him. After that, he heads off to the locker room to get ready for practice where he notices Adam taping up his stick in his stall.

"Hey, Boqer," said Kirby.

Adam looks up and grins. "Kirbs, hey! It's nice to see you again." He stands up and gives Kirby a big hug.

Kirby smiles. "Same here, man. It's good to see you again. And guess what?"

"What is it?" asked Adam.

"The coaching staff just told me that we'll be rooming together," said Kirby.

Adam's smile gets even bigger. "That's great!"

* * *

When Kirby first starts playing hockey again with the IceHogs, he's happy to be back out on the ice although in the back of his mind he hopes that the Blackhawks will recall him at some point this season.

Meanwhile, Kirby and Adam have no trouble getting along as roommates. He feels quite content when he's with Adam and enjoyed spending his free time with him when they weren't playing hockey. Whenever Adam smiles at Kirby, gives him compliments or reassurance when he voices his doubts about how he might not be good enough to be recalled to Chicago, it gives Kirby a warm sense of comfort and happiness that he hadn't felt since he was with Jason.

One night, Kirby and Adam are curled up on Adam's bed, watching Netflix together when Adam scooches closer to Kirby, resting his head on his shoulder.

"You mind if I use you as a pillow?" Adam asks him.

"Not at all," said Kirby.

As the two of them continue to watch their Netflix show, Adam can't help but look into Kirby's eyes which attracts his attention.

"What?"

"Your eyes. They're... they're so beautiful," said Adam.

Kirby blushes a little bit. "Thank you."

"I just love how blue they are," said Adam. "That's my favorite color, you know."

"Really?" asked Kirby. "Mine too."

Kirby finds himself looking closely into Adam's eyes as well, mesmerized by how blue they are. _"So this is what his eyes look like from up close,"_ he thinks.

Just then, he leans close to Adam, his lips inches away from Adam's lips; however, just when he's about to kiss Adam, he stops himself, pulls himself away and gets off the bed.

"I'm sorry. I... I'm sorry about that," said Kirby looking slightly embarrassed.

"What is it?" asked Adam.

"I... uh, I didn't mean for that to happen. I don't know what I was thinking," said Kirby.

"Why? Didn't you want to kiss me?"

"Well... wait a minute," Kirby said. "Are you....?"

"Gay?" asked Adam. "Of course I am, since I was almost 15 years old."

"Really?"

Adam nods his head. "Yeah. I'm very open it about and people know, so it's nothing to be ashamed about. What about you?"

"What about me?" asked Kirby.

"Are you....?"

"Gay too? Oh, yeah, yeah," said Kirby. "I'm openly gay too. Since I was almost 14 years old."

"Well, that explains it," said Adam.

"Explains what?" asked Kirby.

"I had a feeling that you were into me since we met at camp," said Adam. "Alex too. He said that you couldn't take my eyes off me when we met that day."

"He said that?"

Adam nods.

"Well, how did Alex know about it? Does have some sort of gaydar or something?" asked Kirby.

Adam laughs. "That's exactly what I asked him too."

Kirby laughs along with him as well. "People know that I'm gay too, but it takes some time for them to either know or they just figure it out gradually."

"I see," said Adam. After a few minutes of silence, he asks, "How come you didn't want to kiss me earlier?"

"I wanted to. I did," said Kirby. "I just...just wasn't sure if you'd be okay with it. I didn't want to kiss you if you weren't."

Adam gently pulls Kirby back down on the bed with him. "Of course I'm okay with it, Kirbs. You have the go light to do that."

"Go light?" asked Kirby, looking confused at first. "Oh. Oh, you mean green light, right?"

"Yes, yes. That's what I mean," said Adam. "Sorry about that. To me, the green light means go, just like on the traffic lights when you're driving. You have the green light to kiss me, Kirby."

"Are you sure?" asked Kirby.

"I am sure," said Adam with a smile.

Kirby leans over to Adam and the two of them start kissing each other which escalates into a full-on make-out session.

When Kirby feels his lips touching Adam's, he swears to God that he starts seeing sparks. _"Wow, he's a good kisser,"_ he thinks. _"His lips are so smooth. His kisses feel so sweet. He's just... damn, he's so beautiful. He's making me feel so good right now."_

After what seemed like a long time making out, Kirby and Adam are snuggled up together with Adam sound asleep in his arms.

As he lays in bed, Kirby thinks to himself, _"Kissing Adam was just amazing. He's a great guy and I feel good when I'm around him, but now that we've kissed each other, I wonder if... I wonder if he's into me more than just a friend. At first I wasn't sure if I was, but now I think... I think I do too. However, I don't want to rush into anything. I'm... I'm just not at that point yet where I can handle being in a romantic relationship again. I don't even know if Adam's ready for that either. I want to ask him, but not now. I still need to figure this out."_


	7. Chapter 7

One night when Kirby and Adam were watching hockey highlights on television, Kirby gets a phone call from Stan Bowman. He hops off the bed to answer his phone. At first, he's nervous because he doesn't know what to expect, but after a few minutes of talking to Bowman on the phone, Kirby hangs up the phone with a big smile on his face.

"What is it?" asked Adam.

"I got called up. I'm going to Chicago," said Kirby.

Adam hops off the bed and gives Kirby a hug. "That's great! I'm so proud of you! How are you feeling about this?"

"A bit nervous to be honest," said Kirby. "I feel like I got butterflies in my stomach."

"Don't worry, Kirbs. It'll be okay. I'm sure you'll do great," said Adam.

"Do you think I'm ready for this?" asked Kirby. "I mean, it's the NHL. This is... this is the big time."

Adam gives him a reassuring smile. "Definitely. You've been working so hard lately. You've earned this, Kirby."

"I'm going to miss you, Boqer. I wish you were coming with me," said Kirby.

"Me too, but don't worry about it. You never know when the Blackhawks need another defensemen or they think I'm ready for the NHL too," said Adam. "Like I said, it'll be okay and I'm sure you'll do great there."

Kirby smiles. "Well, I guess I need to start packing up for Chicago."

"Before you do, how about a kiss for the road?" asked Adam.

"But I'm not leaving until tomorrow," said Kirby.

"I know, but I just thought I would give you a little goodbye present before you head off to Chicago."

"Okay."

Adam leads Kirby back on the bed and pulls him into a deep kiss which causes Kirby to softly moan.

"Well, I guess the packing can wait for just a little bit," said Kirby as he & Adam started making out with each other again.

* * *

When Kirby gets to Chicago the next day, he's looking forward to making his debut in the NHL. After talking with Coach Colliton, he heads off into the locker room to get ready for practice where the other guys greet him (including Alex, who was happy to see him again).

As he steps out on the ice at the United Center, Kirby feels very happy to be practicing with the Blackhawks and hopes that he'll be able to play in tonight's game against the Washington Capitals. After practice, he gets the good news from Colliton that he will be playing in tonight's game and he'll be on the same line as Patrick Kane & Dylan Strome.

"Hey, guess what?" Kirby asked Alex.

"What is it?"

"I'm playing in tonight's game," said Kirby.

"That's nice, man," said Alex.

"And you know what else? I'm going to be playing on the same line as Kaner & Stromer."

"Kaner and Stromer?" asked Alex. "Wow, that's even better. Playing on the same line with Patrick Kane. That's something."

"Yeah, it is, but I'm nervous."

"About what?"

"About making a good first impression with the team," said Kirby. "I mean, it's an honor to be called up from Rockford to be with the Hawks, but I just... I'm just nervous and I hope that nothing goes wrong."

Just then, Kirby hears Patrick's voice say, "It's normal to feel nervous, Kirby."

Kirby looks up and sees Patrick walking over to his stall. "What was that?"

"He said that it's normal to feel nervous," said Dylan as he walked over to Kirby's stall as well.

"You're not the first hockey player to have first-game jitters, Kirby," said Patrick. "I know what that feels like and so do some of the guys here."

Dylan nods his head. "It's true. Don't stress out about it too much. Just play your game, do the best you can and have fun."

Patrick nods his head in agreement. "Your first NHL game is a once in a lifetime moment. Enjoy it," he said.

Kirby sighs in relief. "Thanks, Kaner, thanks, Stromer."

Patrick smiles. "I'm looking forward to playing with you on the same line tonight."

"Me too," Dylan chimed in.

"So am I," said Kirby. "I can't wait."

* * *

Kirby took Patrick and Dylan's advice to heart during the game. Although the Blackhawks lost to the Capitals 3-5, he had one shot attempt, one takeaway and went 1-for-5 on faceoffs. Okay, so it wasn't exactly the kind of amazing start that he expected to have, but Kirby enjoyed the moment just like Patrick advised him to do. He was even more happy to have his parents & little sister (who took an 8:30 a.m. flight out of Edmonton just to see him play) in the stands cheering him on as well.

In just his second NHL game against the Vegas Golden Knights, Kirby scores his first NHL career goal with assists by Dylan and Olli Maatta. When his teammates congratulate him on his goal, he feels very proud of himself. He didn't expect to score his first NHL goal in just his second game in the league. 

After the game (in which the Blackhawks lost to Vegas in a shootout), Kirby is in the locker room, reading the text messages congratulating him on his first NHL goal from Colton, his teammates back in Saskatoon, friends & relatives. He even gets a message from Adam, who wrote: _"Congrats on your first NHL goal, Kirby. I am so proud of you, älskling"_ along with two smiley face and blowing kiss emojis.

As Kirby smiles and texts him back, he hears Alex from behind him say, "Is that Adam?" 

Kirby turns around to face Alex, pressing send on his phone after texting Adam back. "Yes, it's Adam."

"Did he congratulate you on your first goal?" asked Alex.

Kirby nodded.

"Well...?" asked Alex with a curious look on his face.

"Well, what?"

"What did Adam say?"

Kirby showed Alex the message from Adam on his phone.

"Interesting," Alex said.

"What is?" asked Kirby.

"That he sent you blowing kiss emojis," said Alex. "A teammate wouldn't text you that unless he's either joking around with you or he really, really likes you more than just a friend or a teammate."

"Really? I... uh, I didn't know that," said Kirby.

"Wait, have you and Adam.... you know?" asked Alex.

Kirby looked confused. "No, I don't. What are you getting at, Alex?"

"Have you two kissed each other?"

"Me and Adam?" asked Kirby.

Alex nodded.

At first, Kirby was silent. He didn't feel much like kissing and telling to his teammate, but with Alex waiting for an answer out of him, he sighed a deep breath and nodded.

"So you did kiss Adam?" said Alex. "Wow. So I guess that means he knows that you're gay, right?"

"He does. I told him," said Kirby. 

"Did Adam tell you that he was gay too?" asked Alex.

"Yeah, he did. I didn't know that at first which is why I didn't want to kiss him right away unless he was okay with it," said Kirby.

"Wait, you made the first move and not him?"

"I didn't plan on it. It just... it just happened," said Kirby.

"I see," said Alex. "So..."

"So what?" asked Kirby.

"So now that you and Adam have kissed each other, does that mean you guys are... um, together now?" asked Alex.

"You mean officially?"

Alex nods.

"Um, not really," said Kirby. "Just because we kissed each other doesn't automatically mean that we're a couple or we're getting serious with each other. Besides, I'm still not ready yet."

"To start dating again?" asked Alex.

"Yeah. Hell, I don't even know if Adam's ready for it," said Kirby.

"Have you asked Adam if he is?"

Kirby shakes his head. "No. I want to ask him, but I just don't feel comfortable asking him yet."

"Okay. I hear you," said Alex. "When the time is right and you've gotten to the point where you feel comfortable enough to ask him, just go for it. He might surprise you with the answer."

Kirby smiles. "Thanks, Alex."

As the two of them leave the locker room, Kirby asks Alex, "By the way, what does älskling mean?"

"It means, darling or honey in Swedish," said Alex. 

"Oh, I see," said Kirby.

When he gets back to the hotel, Adam sends Kirby a good night text. Kirby texts him back, saying: _"Sweet dreams, älskling"_ in which Adam responds with three heart emojis.


	8. Chapter 8

**November 2019**

It's been almost a month since Kirby was recalled from Rockford to Chicago; he's been playing great on the ice and he's starting to feel comfortable with the team, who treat him like he's just one of the guys.

When he learns from Bowman that he'll be staying with the team for the rest of the season, of course, Kirby is excited. One day after practice, Kirby tells Brent Seabrook (with whom he has gotten close to since he's been to Chicago) the news that he'll be staying and then brings up the topic of needing a place to live for the rest of the season instead of staying in a hotel.

Although Seabrook didn't say yes to Kirby living with him and his family right away, he insisted on Kirby coming over to his house for dinner a couple of times first, wanting him to see where he would be staying and how he can handle living with not only him & his wife, Dayna, but with their three kids (Carter, Kenzie and Dylan) and three dogs as well.

After showing that he can handle the kids and the dogs, and Dayna giving her approval of Kirby, she and Seabrook allowed Kirby to stay with them. He has his own bedroom in the basement with its own bathroom & mini-kitchen. Kirby doesn't have a lot of rules at the Seabrook house except for doing his laundry and putting his dirty dishes in the dishwasher. 

* * *

One night, Kirby is laying down in bed, talking to Colton on FaceTime.

"So what's it like living with Brent Seabrook?" asked Colton.

"It's... uh, it's pretty good," said Kirby. "I don't mind the kids, the dogs or the noise at all. It reminds me of being back at home."

"Just like the good old days, eh?"

Kirby grins. "Yeah."

Colton talks to Kirby about how he's doing playing hockey in Saskatoon and then the conversation turns to Adam.

"So how's Boqvist doing in Rockford?" he asked.

"Good. He hasn't been called up to Chicago yet, but he's hoping that he will," said Kirby. "It'll be nice to play with him again."

"I see," said Colton. "So..."

"So... what?" asked Kirby.

"So I've noticed that whenever I bring up the topic of Boqvist, you sound very eager to talk about him and when we're on FaceTime talking about him, I can see your eyes light up. Man, I haven't seen that happen since...."

Colton was about to bring up Jason's name, but he stops himself from saying it.

"Since when, Colton?" Kirby asks as he notices his little brother biting down on his lower lip which he usually does when he gets nervous.

"Since Jason," Colton finally says.

"Oh. Really?" asked Kirby.

"Yeah," said Colton, nodding his head. "Does Boqvist know that you're gay?" 

"Yeah, he does. Of course, he does. Hell, the whole team knows by now," said Kirby. "Why do you ask?"

"Well... because of the way you talk about him, I was just curious if you were into him, I mean more than just a friend," said Colton. "Do you like him like that?"

At first, Kirby doesn't know how to answer that question which causes some awkward silence between both brothers.

"Kirbs, you there?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm there," said Kirby.

"You didn't answer my question."

"Sorry, what was the question again?" asked Kirby.

"Do you like Boqvist more than just a friend?" 

Kirby takes a deep sigh and nods his head. "I think... I think I do. I mean, we've been getting close to each other ever since we met each other and then before I was even recalled to Chicago, we kissed each other and...."

"Whoa, whoa. Hold up, hold up," Colton interrupts. "You guys kissed each other?"

Kirby nods. "Yeah."

"Wow. That's... uh... that's something," said Colton. "Does that mean it's official between you and Boqvist? Is he your new..."

"Boyfriend?" Kirby interrupted. "No, Colton. He's not... he's not my boyfriend. Why do some people think that just because you kiss someone means that we're automatically meant to date each other? We're not official. We're just friends. Besides I don't know if I'm ready to start dating again. It's... it's hard to explain why."

"I think I get it," said Colton. "You're not ready to start dating again because you're afraid of getting your heart broken again, right?"

Kirby looks stunned when Colton figures out the real reason why he doesn't want to date right now. _"What, is this kid psychic or something?"_ he thinks. 

"Right," said Kirby. "And plus, I don't even know if Adam's ready to date anyone. I don't know if he's dated anyone before or what. I want to ask him, but I'm not... I'm not comfortable asking him yet."

"Maybe you should.. oh, I don't know, ask him," said Colton. "Just ask him, Kirbs. You'll never know if you don't do it. I know that the breakup between you and Jason was hard, but like you said, you've moved on, so I think you should just go for it."

"Just go for it?" asked Kirby, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah," said Colton. "If you really like Boqvist more than just a friend and you're interested in having a relationship with him, then you should. You don't have to rush into it right away. Just take your time dating him, and if you think that he's the one, you can make the choice to get into a relationship with him."

Kirby smiles. "When did you become such an expert on relationships?"

"I've learned it by watching you and Jason for four in a half years," said Colton. "I remember how anxious you were about asking Jason out on a date and you weren't sure if he'd say yes, but then he did and it worked out. Well, it did back then."

"Thanks for the advice, Colton," said Kirby.

"Anytime, bro."


	9. Chapter 9

One morning, Kirby is having breakfast with Seabs' kids when his phone starts buzzing. At first, he thinks somebody's texting him, but it's a notification from his NHL app which says that Adam has been recalled to Chicago from Rockford. When Kirby reads the notification, he smiles.

"How come you're smiling, Kirby?" asked Carter.

"I just found out that Adam was recalled from Rockford," said Kirby.

"Does that mean he's going to play with you and the Blackhawks?" asked Carter.

"Yes, he is."

"Cool," said Carter as he ate a spoonful of cereal.

As Kirby puts his dirty dishes into the kitchen sink, his phone buzzes again and this time, it's a text from Adam, saying: _"So excited to be back in Chicago. Can't wait to see you at practice",_ adding three smiley face & heart-eyes emojis.

Kirby texts back: _"Can't wait to see you too"_ , adding smiley face & heart-eyes emojis as well.

* * *

During the car ride to practice, things are silent between Kirby and Seabrook as they listen to the radio.

"So, are you looking forward to the road trip in California?" asked Seabrook, breaking the silence.

"Yeah. I just hope that we can get off to a good start on the road, especially after what happened against Nashville," said Kirby.

"Yeah, same here," said Seabrook. "You must be happy to see Adam in person again, huh?"

Kirby nods.

"I've noticed that you've been texting and Facetiming with Adam a lot lately. I hope that you don't mind me asking you this, but are you and Adam... you know?"

"Close?" Kirby asked.

"Well, yes, but I don't mean close as friends, I mean close in a romantic way," said Seabrook.

Kirby gulps. "Uh, no. I mean, not really. I mean, I... um... honestly, I don't know. I mean, I like Adam. I do, but...."

"You're not sure if you like him more than just a friend, is that right?"

"Yeah, yeah," said Kirby. "After we kissed each other, I just can't stop thinking about him. Part of me wants to ask him out and wants to have a relationship with him, but I don't know if Adam is ready for it. I don't even know if I'm ready for it myself although it's been almost 9 months since I..."

"Since you what?" asked Seabrook.

Kirby looks down at his hands and doesn't answer.

"Kirbs, it's okay. You can tell me."

Kirby sighs a deep breath. "It's been 9 months since the last time I was in a relationship. Back in Saskatoon, I dated a guy for four in a half years. I thought that he was the one. The one person that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, you know?"

Seabrook nods. "I hear you."

"But on Valentine's Day after a game, he broke up with me in the parking lot," said Kirby. "It was just... it was just unexpected. I didn't see it coming and it was hard to deal with."

Seabrook gave him a sympathetic look. "I'm so sorry to hear that, Kirby. I had no idea."

"I didn't want to get into another relationship after that because I..."

"Didn't want to get your heart broken again?" Seabrook finishes.

"Yeah, but I think... I think I like Adam more than just a friend, you know," said Kirby. "But like I said, I don't know if he's ready to have a relationship with me."

"Well, you never know unless you ask him," said Seabrook. "But the question is, are you ready for it?"

"I think so, but I just... I don't know yet," said Kirby.


	10. Chapter 10

When Kirby and Seabrook arrive at the rink for practice, Kirby notices Adam in the lobby heading towards the locker room.

"There he is," Kirby said to Seabrook. "You don't mind if I go over and see him, do you?"

"Kirbs, you don't need my approval for that," said Seabrook. "Just go over and say hello."

"Okay, thanks," said Kirby.

Adam immediately makes a beeline towards Kirby when he sees him walking towards him, greeting him with a big hug.

"Kirbs, hey! It's so nice to see you again," said Adam.

"Nice to see you too, man. Isn't this awesome? We're going to be playing together again," said Kirby with a grin.

"I know. I'm looking forward to it," said Adam, grinning right back at him.

As Adam and Kirby head off to the locker room together, Seabrook gives them a smile & a nod before following them to the locker room as well.

* * *

Although the first game of the Blackhawks' three-game California road trip ends in a 4-3 overtime loss against the LA Kings, Kirby picks up an assist on Kubalik's goal.

In the next game against the Anaheim Ducks, Adam scores his first NHL goal which brings a big smile to his face. As he skates back to the bench after scoring the goal, Kirby gives him a fist bump.

"I can't believe it. I scored my first goal," said Adam.

"I know. Welcome to the NHL, Adam. I'm so proud of you, älskling," said Kirby.

"Alskling?" asked Adam, raising an eyebrow.

Kirby blushed. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that out loud."

Adam gave him a reassuring smile. "It's all right, Kirbs."

"Are you sure?" asked Kirby. "Because it just slipped out. I didn't..."

"Really, it is okay, Kirbs," said Adam with another reassuring smile.

* * *

The rest of the game went very well and the Blackhawks ultimately defeated the Ducks in overtime, but Kirby couldn't stop thinking about the way Adam smiled after he scored his first NHL goal; he also couldn't stop thinking about how he called him "älskling" during the game.

After that, it was starting to become clear that Kirby's feelings for Adam were starting to show and even some of his teammates were starting to get wise about it.

On the bus ride back to the hotel, Alex notices Kirby staring out the window and then looking towards Adam, who was happily talking to Tazer and Kaner about the win & his first goal.

"Something on your mind, Kirbs?" asked Alex.

Kirby turns his attention towards Alex. "Uh, no. I mean, why do you ask?"

"It's about Adam, isn't it?"

"How'd you guess?" asked Kirby.

"You haven't taken your eyes off him since the game," said Alex. "What's going on with you two?"

"It's nothing... I mean, it's not a big deal or anything, but..."

"But?" Alex prompts.

"Okay, after he scored his goal, I said, "I'm so proud of you, älskling", but I didn't mean to say it out loud. It just slipped out," said Kirby.

"Whoa, okay, now this... this is really something," said Alex. 

"How so?" asked Kirby.

"I mean, it's one thing to send kiss emojis to each other through text messages, but now that you're starting to call him pet names like älskling... it's only a matter of time before the whole team puts two and two together, man. And I wouldn't be surprised if Adam started getting the hint if he doesn't know already. Have you told him that you want to start dating yet?"

"Well... no. Not yet," said Kirby.

Alex rolls his eyes. "What are you waiting for, Kirbs? It's becoming very clear that you're into him. I know that it's been a long time since the last time you started dating, but you should be more than ready for it by now."

Kirby bites his lip, sighs and looks back outside the window.

"I'm sorry, Kirbs. I didn't mean to sound so pushy about it," said Alex. "It should be up to you to decide if you want to date again. You shouldn't be pressured into it. It's just that from the first day you guys met at development camp, I had a feeling that you were into him and well, to be honest, I think you guys would make a cute couple. If you want to date him, date him. If you don't, that's fine too. Like I said, it's up to you."

Kirby looks at Adam again, seeing the smile on his face and hearing him laughing at something Kaner probably said. He turns back to Alex, sighs and says, "I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna ask him out on a date."

"Because of what I just said?" asked Alex.

"No, because I think I'm ready now," said Kirby. "I'm ready to start dating. I admit it. I like Adam more than just a friend and I don't want to keep these feelings about him to myself anymore. It's been nine months since my last relationship and since then, I've moved on with my life. I'm ready to start dating again and I want to be with Adam."

Alex gave Kirby a big smile. "Good for you, Kirbs. If you want to ask him in our hotel room, I'll be more than happy to give the two of you some privacy. Besides, I'll probably go grab something to eat with one of the guys."

"Thanks, Alex," said Kirby.

"No problem."

As the bus started getting close to the hotel, Kirby started mentally preparing himself for how he would ask Adam out. He thought, _"I just hope that Adam says yes and even if he does, I don't want to instantly get into a relationship right away. I want to take my time with him. Hopefully, it'll work out."_


	11. Chapter 11

After the team got back to the hotel, Kirby changed out of his game day suit and into a t-shirt & sweats. When Alex left the room to go downstairs to the hotel restaurant with some of the guys, Kirby texted Adam to stop by the room because there was something he needed to tell him.

As he waited for Adam, Kirby felt himself getting anxious, thinking about the words to say to ask him out on a date. He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a knock at the door. He walked over the door and looked through the peephole to see Adam standing there. Kirby let Adam inside the room and he sat down on the bed.

"What is it that you want to tell me, Kirby?" asked Adam, sitting right next to him.

"There's something I want to tell you and I've been thinking about this for a long time. I just couldn't find the right words to say it...," said Kirby as he started to look anxious again.

"Well, what is it?" Adam asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"Would you....? Would... would you like to...?"

"Would I like to what?"

"Would you go out on a date with me?" Kirby finally asked.

Adam's puzzled look turned into a smile. "A date? That's what you've been trying to ask me?"

Kirby nodded.

"Well, why didn't you just say so earlier, Kirbs? I'd love to go out with you," said Adam.

Kirby smiled. "Really? You would?"

"Absolutely," said Adam.

Kirby sighed to himself in relief. " _I can't believe it. He said yes,_ " he thought. 

"Kirby, you said that you'd been thinking about asking me out on a date for a long time. Just curious, how come it took you so long to ask me?" asked Adam.

"Well, like I said, I just couldn't find the right words to say it," said Kirby. "Also I wasn't sure if you were ready to date anyone."

"Of course I am," said Adam. "I mean, it's not like you're the first guy to ask me out on a date. I've dated a few guys before, but it wasn't anything too serious."

"Oh, okay. I didn't know that," said Kirby.

"You could've asked if you wanted to," said Adam.

"I just wanted to get to know you more first," said Kirby. "Besides, asking someone you just met if they've ever dated before is kind of awkward. Well, to me it is." 

Adam softly chuckled. "It's okay, Kirbs. I would've thought that was an awkward question to ask someone I just met too."

"Also, I didn't want to rush into anything so soon because I wasn't sure if you were ready for a relationship. I wasn't sure myself because it had been nine months since..."

Kirby stopped talking when he realized where the conversation was heading to.

"It's been nine months since when?" asked Adam.

Kirby looked down at his feet, feeling reluctant to say anything.

"Kirbs, it's okay. Whatever it is, you can tell me," said Adam.

Kirby took a deep breath. "It's been nine months since the last time I was in a relationship. Um, back in Saskatoon, I dated a guy for four in a half years. It was a pretty serious relationship, but on Valentine's Day, he... um.... he broke up with me in the parking lot after a game."

Adam had a sad, sympathetic look on his face. "Oh, Kirbs. I'm so sorry that happened."

"Yeah, it was... it was just unexpected. I didn't see it coming," said Kirby. 

"And you haven't dated anyone since then?" asked Adam.

"No," said Kirby. "The breakup was hard for me to deal with and it took me a long time to get over him, but now I've moved on with my life and I'm pretty sure that he's moved on with his own life too. I'm ready to start dating again and when I saw you, I wanted to..."

"You wanted to date me, but you couldn't find the right words to say it?" Adam guessed.

"Yeah. Yeah, that's right," said Kirby. "But I don't want to rush into anything way too serious with you. I just... I just want to take it easy, take it one step at a time if you know what I mean, right?"

Adam nods his head. "Yeah, I hear you. I understand if you don't want to rush into anything too serious and if you want to take it one step at a time, I'm okay with it, Kirbs. That'll give me some time to really get to know you. And when you're ready to take it to the next level, just let me know, okay?"

Kirby smiled and kissed Adam on the cheek. "Thanks, Boqs."

"Don't you mean älskling?" Adam teased.

Kirby laughed and Adam pulled him into a deep kiss which turned into a make-out session on Kirby's bed.


End file.
